Traveling Gnome

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Lozano:

We have him, and if you don't pay up...well, the tide's coming in.

GnomeNappers

The Traveling Knome: Wherever the wind takes me....; Single, older, rock-hard body, "elfin type" looking for a good time. Loves to travel. Not fond of small children or animals taller than me (pee target). General:Cucumber sandwiches, reading blogs, trying not to dent my hat when I go through the security X-ray machine, the SkyMall catalogue, giving the fellows at Immigration and Customs a tickle, beard conditioners, crumpets, Photoshopping my passport picture so I look just a smidge taller. Music:"The Gnome" by Pink Floyd; those chaps on American Idol; the sound of the captain turning off the fasten seatbelt sign (it's music to my ears!) Books:On the Road; Around the World in 80 Days; The Complete Idiot's Guide to Travel; the atlas. Heroes: Magellan; Neil Armstrong; Jacques Cousteau; Anyone who can claim a bushier beard than me (bring it on, Santa!). Movies:Easy Rider; Endless Summer; Road Trip; The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (oh, you know you loved it, too); A Gnome Named Gnorm; Roaming Romeo. Television:Dora the Explorer; The Amazing Race; Lost. And I'm rather besotted with "What Not To Wear" (as long as they don't decide that red pointy hats are passé, of course).